Tightly Held in Fear and Overly Fearful Rules

I was talking with a fella at dinner on Sunday night about a shocking incident with an Illinois middle school and one of its students. You think that a hug is okay, but in today's highly overpoliticized, hyper-commercialized media circus, where the press is no longer a genuine term, a hug can become an offense.

Hugs are customary, right? And, they are needed. Perhaps if a friend needed consoling or a genuine act of affection to lift them above their fears or worries, would it be alright to give your friend, teacher, or peer a hug? Or, for that matter, can you give a hug for the sake of giving a hug?!

My friend Jared and I were hashing out thoughts over an article published on November 6, 2007 in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch about an Illinois eight-grade student named Megan Coulter, punished with two days of school detention for hugging some friends at school.

Vice Principal Randy Blakely of Mascoutah Middle School warned Coulter on a couple of occasions that any public display of affection would be in violation of school policy. I deduce from the school administration's thought: Coulter's behavior models for other students inappropriate displays of affection publicly or worse. If that is the case, I would think that they would need to examine the root cause of the action. If not, their policy should not be as severe as blanketing all students under a "blind" policy, where the punishment for a 13-year old amounts to two days of detention. Of course, he was doing his job, but could have made a better judgment call.

"Grinding," kissing, or any lewd act would be a negative slope to follow, if Megan Coulter were doing that, but according the short story, which was followed by a longer, detailed follow-up, that was not the case. I really have a problem believing a hug makes other uncomfortable, especially when girls hug girls, or even the opposite sex when it is genuine and innocent. If you ask me, the vice principal perhaps looked too hard at this one student and incident, deciding it was enough to tip the scale. Please!!! There are more important things to look out for -- a hug?

Of course, the student's family is following up with the school's board to appeal her detention and what is to me, a callous treatment of what good is left in the thoughts of this young girl. The policy needs to a little more specific and when there is a serious violation it is followed by just treatment of the offender(s).